In the beginning of 2015 I had fully expected to be living in a different place by now. I already bought my plane ticket, I’ve quit my day job, and I had been mentally preparing myself for the big move. Silly as it may sound whenever I looked at my 2015 planner I’d think this was the planner that would be filled with notes and reminders to help me transition to my new life.
Somewhere along the way though plans, circumstances, and priorities changed.
2015: The Limbo Year
If I were to describe how 2015 felt like for me, it would be like I was in limbo. To explain without diving into too much detail, I couldn’t let myself settle down too much because I am still hoping that this move will happen, yet at the same time I don’t like putting my life on hold for something that is so uncertain.
It’s very paralyzing for me to wonder if can I do this, or can I get that, or can I grab this opportunity because what if this other thing happens, and so on.
But There Are Upsides
I admit I still get frustrated that things haven’t turned out as I had hoped by now, but I also think it might be because it wasn’t the right time yet.
I can’t say that I regret not moving this year because otherwise I could’ve missed out on a lot of great milestones that happened in 2015:
- I transferred my portfolio and blog from Blogspot sites to this shiny, new WordPress home
- I finally started an art and animation vlog on YouTube
- I made some animation for an indie full-length documentary film (still unreleased as of this writing so I can’t show anything just yet)
- I had my first feature in a national newspaper (plus my first real fashion shoot experience!)
- And best of all I got to go to Japan to participate in my first international animation festival! Plus I took a little detour to fulfill a dream of going to The Wizarding World of Harry Potter! (by the way if you told me two years ago while I was
crying overworking on my thesis film Cupid’s Serenade that all the stress will be worth it because that project will bring me to Japan, I never ever ever EVER would’ve believed you!).
It can be easy to forget about all the other blessings when you’re too focused on that one thing that hasn’t happened. Despite not being able to kickstart that *bigger dream* just yet, I think it’s important to remind myself that I was able to turn some other just as important dreams of mine into a reality.
Some of my 2015 highlights from Instagram. I realize a lot of these photos aren’t even on this blog! (oops)
People say that things happen for a reason, and if we are not getting what we want it’s only because “it wasn’t meant to be” or that there is something better in store for us.
While I somewhat agree to this, the stubborn part of me believes that it is only we who can make things happen for ourselves, and how we can truly know that something is not “meant to be” is only after we’ve actively tried everything we can to “make it happen”. And at this point I can’t say that I’ve tried everything just yet.
Maybe 2016 can be THE year?
With that I wish you all an “artventurous” new year, and may 2016 be the year we get to fulfill even more of our dreams!
Now Your Turn!
- How would you describe your 2015? Were there also things that you thought would happen this year but didn’t?
- What are the things you are grateful for that happened this year?
- What are you looking forward to most in 2016?
Sound off in the comments below!